House didn’t visit Tom during the weekend. He stayed away from him, now that he had all the information he wanted and aware there was nothing more to be done, avoiding another life lesson about how he was missing out on Cuddy.
He steered clear of Cuddy as much as possible. She sensed something was up, but he was busying himself with new cases, at least doing his job, so she didn’t bother him. Besides, Tom’s condition was deteriorating fast, so she wanted to try and make sure his last days would be as comfortable and pleasant as could be under the circumstances.
Cuddy had time alone at home. She thought she’d be able to put things in perspective during the couple of days off work, but her exchange with House kept haunting her. She found herself surprised when she didn’t think about Tom. Her thoughts mainly focused on House, his words, his latest behaviors and rather bold advances.
Seeing Tom again had uplifted her in a very special way. At first, she thought it was the recollection of her student days, but then she was honest with herself. She was letting her memories of another man pop back to the surface. Cuddy had made a conscious effort to keep anything personal and related to House locked in a box in her mind. Tom had meant more to her than a fling with a professor; he was significant in regards to her history with House. He’d been her rebound, a lengthy and challenging adventure to help cope with the abandonment. Being around Tom had stir up all those feelings she’d tried to bury in the back of her heart for nearly two decades.
When House had disappeared after their night together, she went through feelings of sadness and anger before claiming indifference. It’s wasn’t as if she was heartbroken or hurt for life, but she knew they had both felt more than they’d let on. Their connection had gone beyond friendship of the flesh. Although she wasn’t naïve, she didn’t expect things to end so abruptly. But that was the first lesson to learn about House. He was more unpredictable and out of reach than anybody she’d ever meet. Yet they had adored and annoyed each other for a semester and during one passionate night, hence, her strong need to throw herself into her studies and aggressively pursue another man once he was gone. It would take her years to discover he’d been just as desolated. He’d wanted to figure out where things could go.
Tom passed the following Wednesday.
It took a while for Cuddy to open her front door. When she spotted House, she just wanted to shut the door in his face as much as run into his arms. They’d been aloof for the past few days and she’d found herself lonely, missing him. Tonight, she was even more aware of her emotions. A part of her had been hoping he’d come to annoy her, to nag her about Tom, or ask if she’d been wearing braids and a tie with that school girl uniform. She had longed for the diversion, the bright wit that only House could provide. He was finally here, at her doorstep, looking awkward and uncomfortable. Why?
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I screwed up.”
House held her red eyes with his. Cuddy sighed, offering a weak yet warm smile that told him she was far from holding him responsible. What she was seeing on his face and in his body language told her it had taken courage for him to show up at her door. The fact his stung ego was not big enough to keep him from checking on her, tugged at her heart. He was clearly worried about her. She could tell by the way he was examining her face more intensely than usual, the way his mouth indicated he wanted to speak but refrained. He was too careful, too uncertain; he was unaware of what he should say to make her feel better and not worse. He was unable to utter trivialities he didn’t believe just to make her feel better. But under the dim light coming from her living room, his blue eyes reflected a tenderness that was made her soften toward him.
“You didn’t screw up. There was nothing anybody could have done,” she said, trying to rationalize as she walked into her living room, implicitly permitting him to follow. “He was an important man, at an important moment. And I feel lucky I was able to know him and have him in my life for a while.”
“Are we still talking about him?” Cuddy turned swiftly to face him, the short ease of their present exchange replaced by wariness. Of course he’d come here to toy with her, to make it about himself, she thought.
“Why are you here House?” Cuddy was tired, emotionally drained, unable and not disposed to playing games. So she went for something direct and she wouldn’t let him cop out this time.
“To play doctor? You be the slutty nurse and I’ll make house calls. I could ring your bell again to make it more real.” Cuddy started to walk away, towards her bedroom. He went after her. “Come on Cuddy. I’m kidding, you know this.”
“I have no patience for jokes tonight House. As you can see, I’m fine. You can go now. Thank you for stopping by and good night.”
She went to her bedroom.
He followed her.
She was resting on her bed, curled up in a fetal position, her back to him. He dropped his leather jacket on one of the posts at the foot of the bed and walked around to stand in front of her. He had not been in her bedroom since his meticulous search a few years back when he saved her handy man.
Cuddy looked away, not paying attention to him. She only seemed to acknowledge him when the mattress moved as he sat down beside her. He was still surprised he’d made it this far.
“He meant a lot to you.” House stated. “I’m sorry he’s dead.”
“No you’re not! You’re just saying this because you’re trying to tell me what I want to hear. That’s not you. You didn’t even like the guy.”
“I’m trying here Cuddy.” She looked at him, regretting her words. They both settled down a bit. “Besides, what’s not to like? Thanks to that chap, I’ve learned more about your dirty little secrets in a week than in twenty years.” Cuddy rolled her eyes. “Plus, he’s dead so it’s not like he can come back as competition, or fight for seconds.” Cuddy shook her head, a little shocked but mainly charmed at his implication and flattery.
Even in her fragile state, she knew better than to take him serious, yet she still wondered if this meant he wanted more. Did he want her, or did he just not want anybody else to have her? How could she tell with this complicated and reserved man?
As for House, he was feeling pleased with himself for helping her relax. He hardly noticed he was making himself at home lying on her bed, now fully on his side.
Cuddy shared a couple of funny memories of Tom, welcoming his sarcastic comments. It was a moment rarely experienced between them. They were usually only raw and unguarded in the heat of an argument or when life - usually his - was at stake, and never as they reminisced.
But then Cuddy implied Tom had been her rebound after House, the man she had set her mind on in an effort to move on from him.
At one point, all talking was brought to a standstill when Cuddy poked him on the chest after a borderline comment and he grabbed her hand as she pulled away. He began to play with it when he realized she was not resisting.
House brought her hand close to his stubbled cheek, taking hold of it with the hand that was supporting his head. He slowly started to trace his way up her arm and neck to her face with his knuckle. His large hand palmed the side of her face, his fingers slid in her soft hair, grazing her earlobe, sending shivers down her spine. They both gulped as their mouths seemed to want the same thing.
Eyes fixed on each other, House’s nose came in contact with the side of hers as his hand guided her head, placing her exactly where he wanted her.
House rested his forehead against Cuddy’s, savoring an instant of respite. They were teased by the anticipation. They were relishing in the instant before a common dream was about to make room for reality.
He kissed her.
His soft lips were gently rediscovering hers, enjoying their fullness. He was resisting the sudden urge to bite on her swollen lower lip. It was so soft and moist, almost trembling from a mix hesitation and enthusiasm. He decided to further probe her mouth with his tongue, and they engaged in a dance that got them both breathless and grappling, as if their now passionate kiss were frustratingly not enough.
House was greedy, relishing the way Cuddy was quick to respond to him. He enjoyed how she was quickly opening up for him and becoming as ravenous as he felt. He brought her body close to his, letting them both feel the effect they had on each other. He had begun to caress her back when a realization suddenly startled him.
“Cuddy, stop!” the confusion and hurt from his rejection displayed on her face made him sick to his stomach. “You’re emotional and vulnerable and if we do this, I don’t want to be the mistake you think you’ve made when you wake up tomorrow.” Cuddy searched for his tell, but he wasn’t lying. She held the side of his face in her hand and kissed his lips softly before resting her head on his chest. Her breathing slowly regained a normal rhythm while his hand sweetly began to stroke her arm and shoulder. Both House and Cuddy melted into each other, finding familiar ease and comfort for more reasons they could consider at the moment. Such simple bliss felt so foreign to them.
“Thank you for being here,” She murmured.
He kissed her forehead, breathing in the scent of her hair, holding her closer to him. “I make a point of never leaving you alone for too long. Annoying you is way too fun.”
She chuckled and looked up to see him genuinely grinning at her, a grin so earnest it felt like he’d saved it for years just for her. She felt his breathing stop, his heart pounding beneath the hand resting on his chest. They were breathless in anticipation of what they were on the brink of setting in motion, again.
It took everything he had in him to stick to his resolution and do the right thing, as opposed to what his whole body desired. “I’ll be on the couch if you need me.”
He didn’t leave her a choice. If he did, she would be less resolute and he would have caved. He wanted to be there for her but he couldn’t be near her to do it. He respected her confused and flimsy state too much to take any chance of crossing any boundaries that would damage a possible future. She might desire him with the same sensations currently consuming him, but he couldn’t be sure it was real under the circumstances.
House made it to the living room and lay down on the couch after removing his shirt and his shoes. He had trouble falling asleep. He was still so worked up from kissing Cuddy. He couldn’t possibly find a release there on her couch while she was so close; she’d hear him. The ache he was forced to endure caused him to reflect on his relationship with her. During the past couple of years, he’d made it his mission to ruin every date he was aware she’d been on; he’d recalled more and more specific details about their past; he’d found himself thinking of her differently than before, and more often. He’d started flirting more strongly with her; he felt like they were in an informal, undeclared and unclear relationship, more than friendship, yet remaining platonic. If he stopped lying to himself, he could admit just how much he wanted to change that last part.
Close to a sleepless hour passed before House took matters into his hands and headed back to her room ‘just to check on her’ he told himself.
Much to his surprise and appreciation, when he arrived at her door, he found her fully awake and sitting at the foot of the bed. What really provoked a feeling of satisfaction in him was the way she was touching his leather jacket. Not only was she feeling the material leisurely and acutely, but she had brought the collar to her face to inhale his scent. The jacket covered the top of her bare legs and House stood patiently observing her. When he saw the fond grin crack on her face, obviously pleased with the smell of him, he thought he would lose it.
He barged in and stood at the door, awaiting her reaction at being caught. She didn’t even try to hide or deny. She looked at him with fierce want, and that was his cue to put behind his resolution and go for what he wanted.
He approached her, coming to stand in front of her. “If this is what you truly want, forget the jacket.” He took the garment away from her and dropped it on the floor. “Go for the real deal.” His words were confident, but his face was timid, full of noticeable self-doubt. Cuddy looked at him, clearly motivated; while he was assertively unbuckling his pants, letting them slide to his feet.
House was towering over Cuddy, his eyes set on her, her gaze unwaveringly skimming his almost naked body. He was scared to believe in the look he saw on her face. That look told him she was more attracted to him than he ever thought possible. Her look told him she found him beautiful, and that she longed for him.
Surely he was reading her wrong. In all their years of banter and guarded closeness, teasing her about wanting him, he could never be sure he was right. He had only hoped. At this moment, her eyes were giving him all the confirmation he needed, and what scared him the most was the prospect of her being able to decipher the reciprocity in his own eyes. A part of him wanted her to finally know how much he wanted her so they would stop playing games and being afraid. Another part of him was terrified of the unknown territory their relationship would enter.
As she was lying on the bed, with only a robe covering her tiny body, her naked shoulder caressed by the black locks falling from her titled head, he found himself wanting access to the tender spot on her exposed neck. He lowered himself to straddle her, and he could sense the increase in her yearning.
He slowly grazed the side of her face with his own while nibbling on her earlobe, before covering the reachable part of her neck with his unrestrained mouth. His lips, his teeth, his tongue were all marking her thin flesh. She could feel her pulsing blood flow and her rapidly rising breathing, and her hands slid over his head, stroking him, encouraging him as he was descending into her cleavage. He nipped delicate kisses on her breasts and rose to meet her eyes again.
“Cuddy…” And he grabbed her face to kiss her with an intensity he could no longer hold back.
He thought about how he was granted the chance to make up for all their heated arguments, to fulfill the flirting moments. He’d wanted to do this to her every single time and now that he could, he was going to make the most of it. Cuddy was right there with him, responding to his every kiss, bite, and lick. She was pliable under the ministrations of his demanding mouth and bold in expressing her own thirst.
House was pressed down on Cuddy, trapping her underneath him.
Her robe was too much to bear, even opened; he needed it off of her. House had been so alone, left without the tenderness of a woman he cared about, that now the soft feel of her negligee was foreign to him. He felt overwhelmed. He wanted to bury himself in this softness forever. It meant being close to her, touching her, knowing her intimately, being in her life. It didn’t mean hard business sex and a cold bed. He realized he wanted to be with her and sleep besides her as much as he wanted to be buried inside her.
Because it was Cuddy, at this moment he was letting himself be overwhelmed, be hopeful, be helpless, and maybe even joyful.
Cuddy’s arms were now garment free and she didn’t waste time. She wrapped them around House, feeling the warm muscles of his torso. She gasped at the contact with him, opening her eyes to look into his. She suddenly wanted to feel his chest crushing hers, flesh to flesh, heart to heart, bared and raw against one another with no physical barrier holding them back. She wanted their emotions to be set free.
It took her the time to figure this out to notice that House was already ahead of her. One of his strong hands was glued to her leg bent at his side, making its way back and forth from her ankle to her butt cheek, feeling her toned, soft skin. Cuddy couldn’t recall the last time she’d felt such deep and sweet attention to this part of her body. House was really exploring her thoroughly, making sure not to leave any area unattended, as if memorizing her, stocking up in case he wouldn’t get the privilege of holding her again. He also wanted to show her his appreciation, his respect and his care for her. He had no choice but the make the most of his time with her and make it all worth their while. They had earned it.
The tension created from their common need was rising quickly between them. They soon put in motion a desperately frantic and pleasing dance that left no room for reason in the push to a satisfactory goal. House pulled the satin that was separating them over Cuddy’s head, revealing her naked body. He had to remember to start breathing again. He admired her delicate shoulders spiking as she raised herself onto her arms on the bed. But the sight that captivated him and brought him fully to life was the vision of her creamy and magnificent perfect breasts offered up to him, at last.
House examined them, heaving before him, seemingly firm and full. It took him a slight nod of approval from Cuddy following his own silent praise to authenticate his theory. They were definitely the greatest set he’s ever had access to. He made it his mission to grant them the deserved gentle consideration that had been titillating him every time he had ogled her cruelly clad cleavage. House was alternating his gaze between Cuddy’s face and her boobs, checking out the effect of his every caress on her. It was then that he felt her pull on his shoulders, drawing him closer, and he didn’t have to be begged to claim her peaking buds with his mouth. Lightly squeezing her breasts together from each side, he held them to him, making sure to latch on to them, almost afraid she would slip away from him. Cuddy was running her fingers through his hair as he was flicking her responsive rigid peaks, alternating from one to the other and using the tips of his thumb and index fingers to provide a full sensation to the one deprived of his mouth. Cuddy had been gasping the second his tongue came in contact with her nerves, and she could feel a string stir within her core and her clit, much like House’s well-endowed throb on her thigh.
House’s hand was soon travelling to her abdomen, down her panties and Cuddy found his slow pace excruciating, which obliged her to guide him towards what she was seeking. He grinned against her skin. The fact that she was bossy even in the bedroom was awfully enchanting to him and he couldn’t help wanting to obey every order she would give him in this instant. He cupped her mound over her panties, patting her just where she liked but only enough to tease her. But when he felt Cuddy getting restless, he slipped under the rim of her satin panties and palmed the syrupy moisture coating her whole swollen sex. The realization that he caused such stimulation and arousal had him look at her in awe.
“Cuddy, you’re killing me.” He whispered stroking her smoothly, watching her animation gradually build. She grabbed his forearms with both hands as if to prevent him from stopping. He could feel her tight grip on his limb but also the slickening resulting from his touch. He couldn’t stay like this. He had to have more of her.
“I need to smell you…I want to taste you…and I’m going to feel you.” He detailed to her with more craving than she had ever heard. And he removed her panties with the same swift motion it took him to place his head between her thighs. Cuddy whimpered from the anticipation and the loss of contact where she needed him.
“House…” Cuddy ached.
It was Cuddy’s turn to remember how to breathe when she saw House look up at her before diving in and taking his first lap. He went in raw and rough right away, not giving her the chance to accommodate to his hunger. She was struggling to keep up with the immense pleasure he was giving her. Humming his appreciation while lapping at her, and with his eyes never leaving her face, she crumbled before him, enjoying his ministration and feeling beset from his power.
She enjoyed seeing him enjoy himself, watching her come apart because of him.
House held Cuddy down by trapping each of her thighs, spreading her apart for him, keeping her open and acquiescent. He was feasting on her, licking her all over and tasting her core, spending more time on areas and moves that pleased her the most. When he insisted on circling her most sensitive spot, she squirmed and squealed from pleasure, pushing her hips to receive more of his gifted devotion. Cuddy was soon losing herself in his mouth, the doting effect of his tongue and lips affecting her more than she thought possible. Her moans were filling his ears with the succulent sounds of escalating passion he’d never imagined he’d ever hear from her again.
Cuddy involuntarily closed her eyes and pulled her head back, raising her chin to the sky. Her thighs soon captured House’s head while holding onto the sheets reaching the supreme bliss delivered by his proficiency.
“Oh God, House!” She was panting, still in ecstasy, swooning over the passionate upshot. House eased his contact with her and let her ride out her pleasure until sated.
When Cuddy regained some sort of consciousness, she brought his face back to hers and kissed him languidly without any restraint. She tasted herself on his lips, as if to make sure this had really happened but also as a way to show her content current condition and to acknowledge him as the one responsible for it.
Out of breath, they broke the kiss, and House rested his forehead against hers, basking in this exceptional moment of peace and gratification. She soon brought her hand to stroke his face while he kept holding her in his arms.
“How could you have waited twenty years to do this to me again?” She accused him in a sincere, sweet tone. He could tell she had been longing for him, and felt regret at being too terrified to do something about his own longing. He sighed and couldn’t bring himself to look at her.
“I don’t know. I was an idiot?” She chuckled insouciantly.
“We both were.” She said in all seriousness.
House felt he would explode if they didn’t resume their previous activities. He was grinding his crotch to hers, hoping to finally feel the molten part of her that surely was completely ready for him.
She took hold of his hardness and started to stroke him using the profuse dampness oozing from his tip. “Let me make you feel as good as you just made me feel,” she said to him.
“Later.” House uttered quickly surprising them both. “I can’t wait anymore. I need…we need…” He conceded as he was urging further contact with his hips.
Cuddy could feel House’s body boiling and burning from his trembling desire for her. She let go of him and wrapped herself around him, indicating she was plainly expecting and allowing him to take charge and indulge in what he had in mind. What they both had in mind, actually. It was the same thing that had happened between them two decades ago on a cozy and casual winter night when they both believed they’d never have to wait so long for another night together.
He was rubbing his length over her silk slit, teasing them, spreading her dampness on her sensitive swollen bud with his hard head. They were both panting and a tremor ran through them yearning for more.
“If you don’t want to come without me again, you better stop reminiscing.” Cuddy looked up at him, guilty. He had noticed how she was so turned on by the sweet stroke she might burst once more before he’d even filled her. “I’m with you though,” he whispered. “I can still recall every little detail about that night: the way you looked, the way you smelt, the way you sounded, the way you moved, the way you felt, the way I was with you…in you…how you made me feel…for you.” The tale of their sexual exploits was firing them up. House was purposely working her up.
They had reached the point of no return. There was no pretense. House was about to forfeit their long time make believe friendship by turning their fantasies into reality.
“Please, House, just…” and he plunged inside her heat, unable to refrain the rough first thrust of his hips that couldn’t wait any longer. Her whine forgotten, she was whimpering from the stimulation of all her senses, responding to his primal growl at finally being able to take her the way he wanted. He was holding the base of her neck with one large hand, grasping urgently while his other hand cupped her ass to pull her into him.
They were closer than ever, limbs tangled together, and as his piercing blue eyes locked on hers, she felt so overwhelmed her mouth reached for his chin and her teeth jaggedly grazing his stubble. He went for her neck as his chest slid along her breasts, keeping her nipples permanently sensitized. His body pleasured hers and it was impossible to stay in control and she started to writhe under him. His hips met hers; hers copied his moves, involuntarily driving him impossibly wild.
Cuddy’s hands were too frenzied to even register what they were grabbing, but House felt her nails planted, digging into the hard flexed muscle of his ass. This was the lioness he recalled. While her other arm covered his whole upper body alternating from his arm and shoulder to finish on his neck, he was at the stage of pounding deeply and slowly into her. His need and want for her taunted him but made him willing to take the challenge. He was savoring her like a scarce sober euphoria, making sure to feel everything about her there was to feel.
“Cuddy…you feel…unbelievable.” House was grunting between his teeth. She cried out in sync with her walls contracting around him at the sound of his voice so sweetly expressing how much he was enjoying her. He had unleashed a chain reaction within her that was impossible to stop. She was grinding hurriedly under him, trying to get the most of this man she had mused about so many times. He was responding to her pace, their rhythm perfecting their dance. His hands and moves anticipated her every desire, not missing one bit of what she was giving him. He wanted to take it all and give it all to her. Their breaths caught together and limbs locked as if to never let go. Their loins were nearing soreness from the hysterical motions driving them closer to the edge.
“House, my God House, you’re incredible.” Cuddy felt so warm and undone melted with his body he was kicking himself for letting his fear take over his needs. He had been kept painfully away from her bliss. House’s natural expertise unapologetically claimed her whole. She was his best; he made her his best, again. He was basking in the utmost harmony that he could only experience because it was Cuddy.
They were remembering together. They were rediscovering each other, finally raw and refined again, against one another, indulging their bodies and minds. Stuck together over the soft sheets with their hearts and flesh joined, they couldn’t pretend anymore.
Any act they were trying to pull or lies they were telling themselves were dropped the second they had kissed. The confirmation came with the first thrust of House inside Cuddy, resulting in the commanding orgasm they were flying towards. House was chasing his ultimate contentment by hunting hers.
“My Cuddy, come with me.” He jaggedly told her on the brink of climax, and Cuddy came, lengthily, loudly, fastening around his body and squeezing his still sliding sex until she pulled him in her fall. House was capitulating in her arms, inside her, holding nothing back as evidenced by the way he was vocalizing his satisfaction. He secured her enthusiastically, allowing them both to feel the ripples of their orgasms until serenity prevailed.
They stayed tucked together for a while, almost drifting to sleep.
“We really are idiots!” Cuddy was startled. “Idiots who could be porn stars, but idiots nonetheless.” Cuddy snorted, not on the brink of sleep anymore. House pulled her closer to him so she could rest on his chest. His arm encircled her.
“We’re still idiots who are amazingly good in bed.” She granted. House laughed and looked at her tenderly.
“So this is why you’ve been so resistant, you wanted to deprive me of the new tricks you’ve picked up since last time?”
“Yeah you’re so right, that was the reason.” She rolled her eyes. “And by the way, we were both already marvelous that night otherwise…”
“We were. But we’re still idiots!” Cuddy looked quizzical. “Idiots for waiting nineteen years to do it again.”
“Does that mean you don’t want to wait that long for the next time?”
“Exactly!” he barked.
They did not wait until morning for round two.
House was standing in Cuddy’s kitchen, trapping her as she was seated on the counter while he was sipping his coffee. “There should be a reward for people who manage to finish a whole mug of your coffee,” he said, making a face.
She smiled. What else could she do? She wasn’t keen on coffee and rarely had the occasion to make it. She smiled wider when she found herself wishing to get the chance to improve her coffee-making skills in the future.
Cuddy bottomed up her tea and said nonchalantly “better hop in the shower or I’ll be late for work.” She headed back to her bedroom. House didn’t keep her wondering if her implication had been understood. He went after her.
He was hoping to change her morning schedule from now on. “You are so going to be late.”
They made is as far as the couch.~The END